I've decided that I'm a corporation from now on. And I'm not sure why more people aren't opting for this. Think about it, you get all of the benefits of being a person, and none of the bothersome parts, like being a member of society and having to actually abide by a bunch of stupid laws.

So while I live and work in Las Vegas, in a state with no state income tax, paying federal income tax alone is tiresome to me. So As far as anyone else is concerned, from now on while I'm earning in Nevada, as a corporation I'm actually earning in Grand Cayman. So I'm losing money, and I'd like the Federal Government to give me a tax refund please. Because as a corporation I'd like my tax incentives for creating jobs... I need people to work in the markets, restaurants, and bars, so obviously I should be thanked for that.

Also, the corporate punishments and laws just sound a lot more appealing. I mean, who knows, I could fly in to a rage one of these days with the arsenal I've collected at home, and just take out a bunch of people. But I've noticed that when corporations kill people, they mostly have to pay some fines that are sometimes as high as 1% of their income. Sorry, income? I meant profit. And it's the same with stealing. So I'm going to opt for the no-jail-time, pay a paltry sum option of punishment, right?

And jobs. The idea of applying and interviewing just sounds tedious. So I'd like a couple of no-bid jobs from the government, please. And prevailing wage, of course. Cos it makes perfect sense that the government pays more for me to do the same job as if I was doing it for someone else.

And by me and I, I still mean me, the corporation. I think this is a good move for me. Less taxes, less chance of going to prison after a murderous rampage or a klepto-spree. Easy jobs forever. And I do mean forever, cos hey, I now technically can't die. Being a corporation is great, you should try it!

I just have to decided if I want to be publicly traded. Sounds kinky.